


Rosa and Maria go to MakiDonalds

by antingaround



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing, Umineko no Naku Koro ni | When the Seagulls Cry
Genre: Alternate Universe - Food Service, Gen, not edited
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-08
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 05:14:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29911944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antingaround/pseuds/antingaround
Summary: What it says on the tin.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 7





	Rosa and Maria go to MakiDonalds

**Author's Note:**

> if anyone is out of character, i'm not sorry. this is the only thing i've managed to write in like two weeks so you're welcome!
> 
> this entire thing stemmed from the desire to make maria ask for a travis scott burger. that's it.

Maki hated this alarm tone-- as a reminder of another five hour shift in Hell, it was way too bright and cheery. But she never bothered to change it, so really it was her own fault that she woke up every night feeling pissed. 

"Fuck! Shut up! Fuck!" She rubbed her eyes and squinted at her phone screen, using all her willpower to resist the urge to throw it across the room. She turned off the alarm and stomped toward the bathroom to pull on her work clothes, sensing impeding doom. That was her special sixth sense! She knew... tonight's shift wouldn't be any ordinary day.

It was already 11:30 PM. Maki headed out, raising an eyebrow at her roommate as she passed by the kitchenette. Miu was... pouring canned beer into a bowl of Cheerios and scribbling something on a paper towel. Perfectly normal behavior for her roommate, so she chose not to say anything besides a farewell. The tenant living in the room across from them was blasting shitty hip-hop music-- Insane Clown Posse? One day, she would figure out who lived in that room and murder their ass. 

A warm draft blew into her face when she stepped onto the escalator. Ah, the subway. The pinnacle of New York City engineering. Or at least it was, like, a hundred-something years ago. Now, it was sort of like... Well. Maki wasn't particularly the philosophical type, so she could really only think of one way to describe it: shit. It was shit. She really wished she had a car. 

Maki glanced at the time. She shouldered her bag and practically leapt down the last flight of stairs, but then skidded to a halt and watched slack-jawed as the train left the station. Fuck! The night just kept getting better. Maki had no choice but to wait for the next one.

"You're five minutes late." Tsumugi-- or, how she liked to be referred to as during work hours, Ms. Shirogane-- frowned down at her disapprovingly when she slid behind the cash register. Not for the first time, Maki wished she was taller. Like goddamn. It was the fucking night shift at McDonalds, not the military. Literally who gave a shit?

"Subway train was running later than usual," Maki muttered. Which was technically true! But only because she had just missed her train, so she had had to wait for the next one. 

Tsumugi shook her head and walked into the back, and the peanut gallery emerged right on schedule. "Yo!" Kaito and his haircut peeked out from inside the kitchen. The menacing aura that she had managed to keep all throughout high school seemed to have no effect now, because everyone at this hellish place seemed intent on becoming friends with her despite her infamous glares. 

"My offer still stands! You can hitch a ride on my car anytime, bro. I don't mind it at all." 

"Pass. Thanks for the offer, but I wouldn't want to burden you." Kaito was very, very, very proud of the fact that he had successfully bought a car before the age of thirty. The fact that it was a piece of shit that couldn't run didn't matter, because in some bizarre turn of events his pink-haired shark-toothed roommate had turned out to be a savant with machinery. Maki half-wished (mostly-wished) that Kaito would get karma for his happy-go-lucky attitude someday, but his day of reckoning hadn't come yet in the month that she had known him. For example, she had somehow gotten stuck at the register with Kaede while Kaito was able to fuck around in the kitchen with Shuichi all shift. She knew that Kaede was at the counter because she was actually a nice person and enjoyed talking to people, but... her? Christ. If there was a god out there, they were definitely laughing at her. 

(Actually, it was just a few witches that were laughing, but Maki didn't know that. Obviously.)

Maki turned her attention to the glass door, preparing herself to greet the next cranky and sleep-deprived businessman that walked in with a perky smile. Maki Harukawa, warm bundle of joy. That was her! Her smile faded into a grimace after a few hours. She really, really wished that she didn't need to do this to pay her rent.

"Hey, are you doing all right?" Kaede stepped into Maki's personal space and she grunted something unintelligible. The blonde seemed to take that as a sign of distress. "You can go take a break, the next wave of people isn't gonna come for another ten minutes or so anyway!" Leave it to Kaede to map out the general activity patterns of customers. Given that she had her head in the clouds (or more accurately, in her earbuds) most of the time, the amount of attention she paid to her job was enviable. Definitely supervisor material once that damn hag was gone.

Speaking of Tsumugi, Maki glanced around the floor for her presence before collapsing onto a seat with cheap stuffing peeking out of the cracked leather. If Tsumugi caught her slacking, she really might just fire her then and there. Thankfully, there was no sign of her. Probably was reading or writing fanfiction or some shit in her special manager's office, as usual. The woman only came out of there every once in a while to check on the workers and piss.

Her eyes slid shut, but the tacky door chime Kaede had begged to be installed on a whim sounded right after she had settled down. Goddamn it.

A middle-aged brunette flipped her hair and strode to the register with a queenly aura. Her high heels clicked on the tiles. An elementary-school aged young child rushed ahead of her, standing on her tiptoes to reach the counter. With an urgency she found extremely funny, Kaede signaled frantically for Maki to come back over to the counter. She dragged her feet and sullenly vaulted over the counter, which prompted a gasp from the rich prick. Err, sorry, wait. She meant valued customer. This woman was a **valued customer**.

"Alright, what do you want to order? Figure it out quickly, mommy needs wi- a nap."

"Jessica showed me a meme with a Travis Scott burger, uu~ I wanna get one!" 

"Absolutely not, young lady. I won't be seen buying a 'Travis Scott burger' in public." At the child's pout, the woman sighed and turned to Kaede. "Where is this establishment's menu for children? A place like this has got to have one."

Kaede's smile wavered. "Um, we have a Happy Meal for kids. The menu's on the top right."

"What makes this meal so 'happy'-" The woman glanced at the nametag, "-Kaede? As I understand it, this food chain uses many unhealthy, unsafe, and unhappy processes to run and obtain food."

Maki leaned over and pointed at the display next to the counter with a very carefully neutral expression. She explained slowly, "We have toys that come with every Happy Meal. The toys make kids Happy. And we have two sets of toys depending on your preference..."

"Ah, you're right." The woman peered into the display case. "See, what I assume are the girls' toys are plastic figures of Disney princess. Don't you want that, Maria?"

The girl-- Maria-- nodded. The woman stared at Kaede and Maki expectantly, and Kaede started.

"Oh! You, um... you still need to order."

"...Right." The woman glanced up at the menu, "We'll be getting this to-go. A combo number 3 for me, with water. And I'll bet you want a Happy Meal with a cheeseburger, apple slices, and chocolate milk, right?"

"Uu~ How'd you know?"

"Mommy knows everything, darling." Kaede sent the order to the back, the woman paid for the order, and Maki relaxed a little. Despite her initial misgivings about the day, it seemed like everything would turn out alright tonight.

Shuichi poked his head out of the kitchen after a while and passed a couple of boxes to Kaede.

With a pleasant smile, Kaede bagged the meals and presented it to the woman with a flourish. "I hope you like it! Enjoy your day!"

The woman and the child walked out... and nearly immediately rushed back in.

"What is the meaning of this?" The woman held a plastic-wrapped figure between two fingers. 

"Is something wrong?" Kaede's impeccable customer service smile shrank a little. Maki raised her eyebrows.

"You said before that those toys--" She pointed at the display case-- "Would come with the order. And yet, we only received one."

"Literally nowhere does it say that you get all the toys on display." Maki huffed. "Just take the stupid thing the kid'll play with for like five minutes, tops, and-."

"That's no way to talk to a paying customer!"

"What're you gonna do, ask for a refund?" Maybe she should have found a different outlet to express her frustration and boredom than some random tired lady, but at least it was entertaining.

Kaede interrupted. "Um, well... Listen, usually I could sneak in a couple more toys for you, but we kind of only have that one figure left. Since we don't really give them out at random, we just... take them from the boxes until they run out?" Kaede shrunk a little.

"This type of service is unacceptable and nothing like I'm used to. See, Maria? This is why we don't visit places like these." Maki felt a headache forming. She had a feeling this wasn't over yet.

"...Can I speak with your boss? I'd like to see the face of the person that manages this place. I can't believe they don't know how to keep stock of inventory... so poorly mismanaged. You poor kids deserve so much better."

"This is a McDonalds. A McDonalds! McDonalds... MakiDonalds... heheh." Maki mumbled under her breath and trudged to the back, knocking on Tsumugi's locked door. She heard a computer screen slam shut and a chair slide back. Then, the door unlocked and Tsumugi pushed her glasses up with a too-wide smile. 

"What's wrong?" Maki left Tsumugi to deal with the customer with a satisfied smile. At least she would actually end up having to do work on her shift instead of doing who-knows-what on her computer.

"Alright, what's the issue here?"

"The issue is that you're clearly an incompetent manager, and you've broken my daughter's dream of getting the whole set of princess figurines!"

"Me?? Doing a bad job? Why, I'd never! It's plain to see that I do my best possible work here under the circumstances, and I- do you know how hard it is to own a franchised business? Listen, I'm just here to watch over the night shift, not the entire place. What are you even upset about!?"

"I'm upset about your so-called Happy Meal! None of this is Happy! Your promise of a dream that can never be found within this wretched place is false advertising."

Shuichi and Kaito approached at the commotion, and all four watched Tsumugi and the woman duke it out from behind the counter. An unidentified object flew right next to Shuichi's head and they crouched down, a little terrified of whatever the fuck was happening out there. Kaede joked, "At least we're not working at Burger King, right? Like, working at night is terrible and all, but you guys are alright."

"I think my roommate works there, and she's turned out alright." Maki frowned. "Well, not exactly alright, but I think she was already fucked in the head _before_ she started working there."

If I continue this story with a comically abrupt ending, the next chapter will be a scene change: Erika Furudo audits Burger King ft. Miu, Keebo, Rantaro, and Himiko. Because, apparently, that place just isn't matching up to safety standards.

**Author's Note:**

> another banger from yours truly  
> i don't miss


End file.
